i cant sleep at night.
i havent been able to since ive met you.
i called you my sparrow, a name you hated.
i feared your departure,you flew just like i knew.
you left me so far away.
off to find a better match.
but i could care less.

im over that mistake.
but im a packrat when it comes to memories.
i just keep them all stored up.

i wish i could forget but who could forget you.
the only emotion i hold for you is pain.
the pain you caused me and the pain ive caused others.
the pain ive inflicted on myself, and the pain you never felt.
you heartless bitch.

im so tired of writing about you.
my ears bleed from thinking of your awful wretched name.
and my heart opens its wounds once more to write this journal.
one that you will never read.

"oh what a world"

well now that im done with that (or am i?)

ive been fighting the urge to cut myself.
its been...
a year?
idk. just want that pain.

my blues music sort of help.
but it always makes me cry.
im just a sucker for miles davis..

and this stupid broken heart that earned me this god forsaken name.
"heartbroken samurai"

i lay in bed and just sit there, wide awake.
my depression comes back along with anxiety..
and i fall once again for my lies.
that im not, when im so far down, ive lost the luxury of light.
so far down in the dark depths of my depression.

im not sure what i am.
i hear music and realize my ipods not even on.
and that im finally falling asleep.. but ruin it by thinking about the music.
XD. lifes a mystery that none of us are meant to solve.

well so much for keeping it short.

some of my friends do this.
so ill do it.

AWESOME DEVIANTS!!

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(im sorry idk how t get the avatars image to show up)


in no particular order

ltrs